Today was not much better than yesterday for me (see yesterday's blog). I went grocery shopping and had a very close call with a panic attack so that I thought I'd have to go home. But I didn't. I calmed myself down and finished shopping. I worry so about money that I'm afraid to spend it since I'm out of a job. But I have to give that to God. I think this is his time of treating me to being home with my kids, helping with homework, making homecooked meals, exercising, bible study, and just me time. This is what I really want anyway.
I followed my own advice and stayed busy, put on some fun music to dance to while working in the kitchen, took a short nap, and did laundry. Once the kids got home we had several things we had to get done, along with homework and dinner. I am so very tired. Again, I stress the feeling of nothing ever changing and not having accomplished anything.
I write these things not to complain, but to let others out there know they aren't alone. There are many of us who suffer from these feelings and our coping mechanisms don't always work. It is so important to first consult our Great Physican, Almighty God, and let him lead you to the right Christian counselor and/or psychatrist. Read positive books and listen to positive cds. Some of my favorites are Joyce Meyer's Battlefield of the Mind (which is my current bible study) and anything by Joel Osteen and Jentzen Franklin. They are very positive and very biblically based. As Paul said, "keep the faith". Hope you find some help in my words.
Til next time,
Michele
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