Sunday, November 20, 2011

Panic Attacks

You would be surprised if you knew how many people have panic attacks.  Many people think they are having a heart attack, when its panic. (If you are not sure, please get it checked out ASAP).  It keeps people from going places and living a full life.

I had one last night.  I knew what it was but was helpless to stop it.  All because 2 of my kids went to a school play to which my son drove. The play was supposed to be over at 9 or 9:30.  Well we were at a friend's house having dinner and watching a movie.  But from the minute they left, I zoned everything and everyone else out.  I couldn't concentrate or carry on a conversation.  Then they texted me and said it was running late and they wouldn't be home til after 10pm.  Visions of every mom's imaginable fear began to take shape in my mind and my mind took control; or better described as lost control.  I paced, got a migraine and got sick at my stomach.  When we went home and they texted me they were getting ready to leave, I alternated praying at the cross in my living room to watching the road for headlights, to pacing, to cleaning, to starting the whole process over.  I have never been so grateful to see headlights coming in my driveway.  And when my teenage daughter asked me to tuck her in, I was thrilled.

Now this is probably normal for parents whose kids are just starting to drive.  But my depression and anxiety kicked it into overdrive.  It was miserable for me and everyone around me.  I'm sure the effects of this are one reason I am up at 5:30am on a Sunday morning typing my blog and drinking ginger tea to sooth my stomach.

I write this again with the hope that it will help someone else.  It helps to know we are not the only one going through such things and that other people do experience some of the same pain and suffering that we are.  I have no answer for the panic attacks other than praying, staying busy, and knowing your not alone.

Relentlessly in search of our Savior's peace, M.

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